Cris Cyborg is one of those women who I’m very comfortable admitting that I’m terrified of. Sure, there are plenty of other professional female fighters who are more decorated than she is, but just because a girl has a few medals doesn’t mean that she’s the most dangerous person in the room. Sure, I would never say anything to piss off the likes of Holly Holm, Ronda Rousey or Miesha Tate, but I also don’t think that they would just snap and attack me out of nowhere.
I totally feel like Cyborg would.So yes, I watched her UFC debut last night. I was a little drunk and, in turn, also a little scared to speak badly about her in case one of her people passed the word back to her and she came after me. Luckily, there wasn’t much to make fun of since she turned Leslie Smith into a jar of Playdoh.
First off, we have to give Leslie Smith credit. Mostly because, despite being sprawled out on the mat and having her face beaten in, she still maintains that the fight stoppage was bullshit and she was just about to get up. Sure Leslie. I totally saw your scheme of waiting until your legs turned completely into jelly before pulling yourself back up. I’m sure that’s what everyone will be talking about in the next few weeks. But let’s go back to Cyborg because, come on, how can you not be terrified. If eating people’s faces wasn’t illegal in the UFC, no doubt that Cyborg would’ve used her molars to steal Leslie’s nose. It’s worth noting also that this was Cyborg’s UFC debut so, really, who knows what she’s been doing for the past few years to keep herself in fighting shape. She has been popping up in other fight leagues, but the world is a big place. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s been jetting around the world to kill people in bare-knuckle brawls just to keep herself fight ready. You never know when you’re going to have to drop your gloves and rip someone’s face off.
