Leonardo DiCaprio has a decent life. He’s made an estimated quarter of a billion dollars by making a career pretending to be other people. He is also who my girlfriend thinks about while she’s banging me, so that’s reassuring. The 42-year-old DiCaprio shows no signs of slowing down either–securing his first Oscar last this year in his 25 year acting career and has never battled through the existential crisis/drug addiction we see from most celebrities who have experienced long-term fame.
And, the women–supermodels, actresses, my mother, you name it. News broke in June that Leonardo has so much sex that he reportedly vapes and wears headphones during sex. How much sex do you have to have with the world’s hottest women to throw on a Nickelback album before orgasming? The answer: too much for you and I to comprehend.
I’ve taken the liberty of putting together a completely scientific list of Leonardo’s 15 confirmed girlfriends in order of attractiveness. I definitely missed a few so don’t nail me to the cross in the comment section because Kate Winslett made the list, I have more blogging to do today than to do a deep dive into Leo’s fuck buddies. SO without further ado…
15.) Kate Winslett — Actress
14.) Bijou Phillips — Model
13.) Claire Danes — Actress
12.) Amber Valletta — Supermodel
11.) Demi Moore — Actress
10.) Tori Garrn — Supermodel
9.) Naomi Campbell — Supermodel
8.) Bridget Hall — Leo’s First Supermodel Girlfriend
