Water Cooler Talking Point: “Having been one of the millions of people who had their identities stolen, I was thrilled for justice to have been served. Tonight I’ll peacefully drift to sleep dreaming of one day walking past a homeless Jun Ying.”
It wasn’t a good day to be a disgraced corporate villain.
Elizabeth Holmes, the infamous founder of Theranos, who treats every day like its Halloween and the only costume she owns is “Steve Jobs,” was charged with fraud by the SEC.Holmes and her chief deputy raised $700M on the promise of single-drop blood testing. The issue? Their “flux capacitor” for blood testing didn’t exist. They were simply retooling current technology to conduct the tests.
But wait, there’s more …
Pitch decks claimed $100M in revenue in 2014 when the actual figure was closer to $100k. Rounding error? They even pulled the “American hero” card, claiming their technology had been used by the US military on the battlefield in Afghanistan.
Their technology caught the attention of Walgreens and attracted high profile advisors including Henry Kissinger and James Mattis. But things began to unravel when the company was forced to recall tens of thousands of tests.
Yesterday’s decision will force Holmes to give up control of the company and pay a $500k fine.
Water Cooler Talking Point: “Listen, I’m a proponent of fake it til you make it but once you start lying about helping America win wars, you’ve crossed the line. Not cool, Elizabeth, not cool at all.”
What do you get when you combine decent quality products, an affordable price, the ability to order online and the option to try on at home? That’s right, a $75M dollar investment from T.Rowe Price and a $1.75B valuation.
At least, that’s what’s happening for Warby Parker. The online seller of $95 lenses and frames just closed another funding round that all but secures the company’s ability to go public in the near future. The company announced that it will have positive EBITDA for the first time since it made the “Harry Potter” look cool in 2010.
Under the guidance of a revamped board that includes its first female members, the new funds will be used to help roll out the company’s Prescription Check app. The service allows users to forego the eye-doctor and get their prescription online, through the app. How do you like them apples, LensCrafters?! [INSERT WARBY PARKER’S LEGAL JARGON ADVISING GENERAL EYE EXAMS WITH A CERTIFIED OPTOMETRIST].
Water Cooler Talking Point: “I’m a big fan of Warby Parker. It’s covered by my insurance, in-store employees appear to have more of a will to live than LensCrafters’ staffers, and having a pair is pretty much a requirement if you live in Brooklyn.”
Dane Cook (yes, that Dane Cook) said it best: “There are those times when you need to cry, I’m talking about when you need to open up your soul and have a weep-a-thon.”
Its ok to cry. In fact, it’s much more healthy than burying negativity and sadness somewhere in the depths of your soul.
And while the office might not seem like the ideal place to go all Evelyn in “A League of their Own,” it’s totally acceptable in certain circumstances. Spoiler: the list includes more than “when you find out you got laid off.”
Unsolicited Advice: “If you’re a tough guy who claims he hasn’t cried since ‘Nam, get over yourself. While I don’t condone daily sob-fests in your cubicle, there’s nothing wrong with letting loose in the comfort of your home or your shrink’s office. If Tony Soprano can do it, so can you.”
