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I think I speak for most Americans when I say — enough is enough with the Royal Family. Have they considered, perhaps, simply shutting the hell up? They’re in the top .01% of luckiest people on Earth and yet seemingly every day, they’re on the news complaining about something else. It’s obnoxious and pathetic.
However, due to their apparent addiction to airing their dirty laundry out for all to see, we have been blessed from Prince Harry’s new book Spare, which is going viral for all the wrong reasons.
One blurb, for example, sees him earnestly citing a quote that he found on… BrainyQuotes.com.
Prince Harry is often caricatured as a dim-witted Hooray Henry. But his new memoir reveals a more sensitive, even rather bookish side pic.twitter.com/mGmjexP9Uv
— James Greig (@jamesdgreig)
There’s also a clip of him talking about how applying a topical ointment to his manhood reminded him of his late mother, Princess Diana:
“My penis was oscillating between extremely sensitive and borderline traumatized,” the clip, read by Prince Harry himself, begins.
“The last place I wanted to be was Frostnipistan. I’d been trying some home remedies, including one recommended by a friend. She’d urged me to apply Elizabeth Arden cream. ‘My mum used that on her lips. You want me to put that on my todger?’ ‘It works, Harry. Trust me.'”
“I found a tube and the minute I opened it the smell transported me through time. I felt as if my mother was right there in the room. And I took a smidge and applied it down there.”
This book is a Freudian nightmare. pic.twitter.com/PPJtjPXWvq
— Dominic Wakeford (@domwakeford)
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